How To Be More Confident!

Confidence is key. I am sure we have all heard that. We hear how we have to be confident in ourselves and in our abilities. One of the main things I have always heard was to have confidence in my abilities. However, that is a lot easier said than done. People who aren’t naturally confident can’t just hear “Confidence is key. Be confident.” and then suddenly all of the confidence issues disappear. Life just doesn’t work that way. Still, the statement is true. It is majorly important to have confidence. Why? Well, wen we don’t have confidence in ourselves we are less likely to actually put our goals and dreams into action. We find ourselves paralyzed because we don’t believe in ourselves.

Confidence gives you drive. Having confidence leads to motivation. When you have confidence you will challenge yourself and push yourself to new heights and new limits because you believe in your ability to make it through. These are some pretty good reasons to have confidence, huh? So, how do you gain confidence? I won’t lie, this was something I struggled with myself. So, don’t think I was some naturally confident person who is now trying to preach confidence to others. No, I went through this struggle and I overcame my issues. Now, you can’t tell me nothing because I am perfectly aware of how beautiful and wonderful I am inside and out (I am not as arrogant as that may have sounded. I am just truly a confident person). I believe everyone should feel that way about themselves and their ability to be successful. So, what did I do to help me become a more confident person and get that drive to chase my dreams? Let’s find out!


How To Be More Confident

  • Dress to impress. One thing that helps gain confidence is to dress your best as regularly as possible. When you walk out the house slaying a new outfit, there is a new feeling of confidence that will overwhelm you. In fact, that is one of the biggest reasons I wake up and try to dress all cute as often as I can (not as often as I would like) because that confidence will lead to you wanting to act according to how you look. Next thing you know you’re slaying your to-do list because you look like somebody who slays their to-do list. So, start trying to wear clothes you feel like you look good in on a regular basis and WALK THAT WALK, sis!
  • Be “high maintenance”. I never really considered myself high maintenance until the past four years or so when I really started coming into my own. When I say high maintenance, I mean do an abundance of self-care activities. Things like mani-pedis (my favorite thing in the world), massages, and being particular about what you allow for yourself. I try to only get the best, NOT the most expensive, but the best for me. Being high maintenance has a bad rep. Nobody is telling you to be boujie ( I have no idea how to actually spell that word), but I am telling you that knowing that you are constantly taking care of yourself does help boost your confidence. I get my eyebrows threaded now and you can’t tell me NOTHING after I have gotten my eyebrows slayed!
  • Battle Negative self-talk. Negatively talking to yourself and reminding yourself of why you don’t like this or that about you is literally the equivalent of you attacking yourself. Why would you want to do that? I made a video on how to battle self talk so if you’re interested in learning more about how to battle this toxic behavior, you can go check that out on my channel (and you know, subscribe if you feel like it).
  • Compliment yourself daily. You have to hype yourself up. I used to constantly tell myself that I slayed. When I first met my love and I was going through a depression and was lacking in confidence, he used to make me stand in front of the mirror and call myself beautiful every day. Now, I already knew I was beautiful and I was only temporarily lacking confidence due to my depression, but amazingly enough, that method actually had a huge impact on me. I would suggest hyping yourself up to anybody. You believe your own words more than you believe anyone else’s so those are the words that you need to be focused on controlling.
  • Praise yourself for small accomplishments. In addition to complimenting yourself, it is also vital that you congratulate yourself even on small accomplishments. If you finished your to-do list, congratulate yourself for that. The praise for the small things gives you the confidence and motivation to want to do the big things.
  • Fake it til you make it. I was pretty much the queen of this in high school. I pretended like I was confident by walking the walk and talking the talk. Eventually, I started believing the things that I was already saying. Like I said, you have the strongest influence on yourself. You may not believe that, but trust me. Once you convince yourself of something, it’ll be very hard for somebody else to convince you of something different.


Nobody is saying that having confidence is going to be easy. It can be kind of a hard road. But once you discover who you are, how you’re built to overcome your obstacles, and how you’re made to soar… the confidence will come. You will have to fake it until you make it for awhile, but take it from someone who has been through it. The making it will come. You are amazing. You are talented. You will be successful. A confidence issue is fixable. Is it easy? No, it isn’t. But it’s worth it and you’ll be much happier afterwards.

So try these steps and hopefully what worked for me works for you. So, what helps you with confidence? Comment down below!



  1. The PhD Mummy on 01/29/2019 at 3:28 pm

    Some solid bits of advice here! Thanks for sharing

    • cherishingflo101 on 02/02/2019 at 10:01 pm

      Thanks so much for reading!

  2. Marry Ann on 01/30/2019 at 11:50 pm

    Being confident won’t work always. Skills also play a major role.

    • cherishingflo101 on 02/02/2019 at 10:01 pm

      This is a great point!

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      Oh no being confident and learning how to love yourself is nowhere near easy! It’s simple, but not at all easy! It just takes a LOT of practice of practical steps if that makes sense?

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