How To Stop Sabotaging Yourself

You’d be surprised by how often we all stand in our own way towards our dreams. I recognize new ways I’m my own roadblock more often than I’d truly care to admit. The truth is, it’s human nature. It’s very natural to get in our own way by doing things like:

  • Talking negatively to ourselves
  • Being lazy
  • Procrastinating

There’s actually a lot of other things that we do to get into our own way, but these are, what I feel, is the top three. I have done and still do all three of these things from time to time, ESPECIALLY procrastinating. If procrastinating was am Olympic sport, I’d have the golden medal.

So, how do we stop success blocking ourselves? I’m going to share with you guys what works for me, and then I’d LOVE to hear about what works for you if the comments!

How To Stop Self-Sabotaging

  1. Be extra nice to yourself. We all tend to be our own worst enemies at times. Nobody is perfect. We all know that and yet we choose to belittle ourselves over every flaw. If you’re anything like me,then realizing what it is you’re doing to block your own success may have caused you to start cursing yourself out. I recently was in a slump and when I thought about all I could’ve been doing instead of wallowing, I was so upset with myself and beat myself up so much that I wallowed for another week. Take intentional time to be kind to yourself. Acknowledge that you get in your own way and then remind yourself that yesterday doesn’t have to control what happens today. Remind yourself of all your best qualities. I spend some time in the mirror complimenting myself and repeating my strengths out loud while I’m getting ready in the mornings. Try that. Try being your own cheerleader and encouraging yourself instead of criticizing yourself all the time.
  2. Ask yourself why you’re sabotaging in the first place. What is the real reason your sabotaging yourself? As I  mentioned in the last blog post everything we do is motivated by SOMETHING. For me, and for a lot of other people, it’s fear. I would and still do get afraid others will reject the content I had worked so hard on. So I sabotaged it before before anyone else got the opportunity. Ridiculous, right? But it’s human nature. I didn’t even realize that I was doing it at first. Some of us will insult ourselves before others can mention those insecurities and for so,e reason we think that will minimize the damage on our self-esteem and mental health. Let me be the first to tell you: it doesn’t. You believe what comes out of your own mouth more than you think. A lot of times our own influence is impacted the heaviest on ourselves.
  3. Cut off negative self-talk. In addition to uplifting yourself you have to eliminate the voice that tries to put you down. I talk about how to be rid of this voice in more detail in a YouTube video, but basically what you have to do is discredit and argue with that voice. It serves no positive purpose and the amazing thing about it is YOU DONT HAVE TO LISTEN TO IT. It’s your choice what truth to accept.
  4. Get proactive. One of th best ways to stop self-sabotaging is to work through how you may feel. Discipline yourself to get up, go out, and work on your goals and dreams no matter what negative talk says. Regardless of how lazy you feel, move through it. No matter what happens around you, what you do is your choice. You can’t give in to negative thoughts and damaging behavior if you’re too busy out here making boss moves. I get up every morning and start by getting to it because if I let myself sit and think, the sabotaging will begin immediately. So start doing things to progress immediately with no hesitation.
  5. Don’t do it alone. Get yourself some amazing like-minded encouragers. I have group chats full of girl bosses who always remind me that I can’t move forward if I’m sabotaging myself. They’ll call me out on my progress blocking behavior rather I want to hear it or not. They help me to Regina accountable and they are constantly confirming me in who I am and the value that I have to offer. Get yourself some people who will keep you rooted in who you are and remind you that you gotta handle business. If you don’t already have friends like that, REACH OUT TO ME. Sign up for the email newsletter so that you can encouraging messages from me that’s exclusive for my subscribers. DM me on any of my social media accounts that I’ll leave below and just let me know that you need someone to consistently check up on you and help you cease sabotaging yourself and I’m THERE! I will be your accountability partner happily!

If you are someone who sabotages yourself, don’t beat yourself up about it. I’m fact, don’t even allow yourself to linger in the thought. It’s solution time now. These are the things that I do to help minimize the amount of time I spend sabotaging myself. It has worked WONDERS for me.

What do you do to sabotage yourself? Which one of these tips do you think are the most impactful? Comment your thoughts down below!

22 Comments

  1. Esther Adeniyi on November 13, 2018 at 11:59 am

    Thank you so much for this post. I would like to think it came at the nick of time.

    It was early this year I came to know that self compassion is actually a thing. Even though I sometimes beat myself it doesn’t take too long for me to come around and be nice and kind to my being.

    Great post

    • cherishingflo101 on November 14, 2018 at 11:21 am

      That’s really awesome and I’m so glad it could come at the right time for you! Thanks for taking the time to read and comment!

  2. Lily on November 13, 2018 at 1:25 pm

    This is such great advice. Thank you for sharing it in such a clear way. I really liked what you said about paying attention to how you’re feeling.

    I think to many people tend to ignore what they’re phsicsly feeling about something. But those clues can be really helpful on guiding us and you made that point well.

    • cherishingflo101 on November 14, 2018 at 11:20 am

      I completely agree! Thank you for pointing that out! That’s such a good point. We do tend to try and “tough it out” instead of listening to what our bodies and hearts are trying to tell us.

  3. Morgan on November 14, 2018 at 11:46 am

    Awesome post, it’s so important to be loving to ourselves the very most!!

    • cherishingflo101 on November 14, 2018 at 1:55 pm

      Very true! Such a shame we neglect ourselves so often!

  4. Chloe Chats on November 14, 2018 at 12:00 pm

    Love this! Great tips – it’s so important to be kind to ourselves. I always think about how I treat others and then say to myself that I should treat myself with the same kindness. It’s hard sometimes, we tend to focus on the negative things more for some reason, I always like writing down what I’ve achieved in the day – helps me with being positive. Thanks for sharing! 🙂

    Chloe xx
    http://www.chloechats.com

    • cherishingflo101 on November 14, 2018 at 1:57 pm

      Writing down what you’ve achieved is such a great idea! Give yourself some praise for your accomplishments! I may start doing that myself!

  5. Layna on November 15, 2018 at 12:03 am

    I love this post! It really spoke to me. It’s true that we are the first to throw our ideas away because we’re afraid of other’s opinions.

    I should really start changing that perspective and stop sabotaging myself. Thanks for sharing!!

    Layna
    http://www.beautybeyondtwenty.com

    • cherishingflo101 on November 15, 2018 at 10:12 am

      Thanks for commenting! You’re so right! I’m working on changing my perspective as well!

  6. Andrae on November 16, 2018 at 3:22 pm

    We have to be kinder to ourselves. The longer we worry about our situations, the longer we are unproductive. Great post!

    • cherishingflo101 on November 17, 2018 at 8:53 am

      I COMPLETELY agree! I have had to learn this lesson the hard way! Thanks so much for your input!

  7. Sara | mshealthesteem.com on November 16, 2018 at 9:01 pm

    This post is full of such powerful and beautiful advice! I adore it. Your encouragement to work in self-love and even reach out and get help is truly marvelous ♡. Thanks for sharing 😘

    • cherishingflo101 on November 17, 2018 at 8:54 am

      Thanks so much for that hon! I appreciate all of the positive vibes!

  8. D on November 17, 2018 at 11:02 am

    The best part I like most about your points is about talking to like minded people. I am actually trying to be around more positive people and people who really do care about what they say and do. People who want to be around me for who I am and because the enjoy my company just as much as I like theirs!

    D, xo || from https://livedreamcreate-d.com

    • cherishingflo101 on November 18, 2018 at 2:25 pm

      That’s majorly important! It’s been something I’ve been working on lately as well and it has made a huge difference!

  9. Georgi on November 17, 2018 at 11:08 am

    This was such an interesting read and I really relate with the negative thoughts, being lazy etc. I will definitely be taking this advice of overcoming it and defeating it!

    • cherishingflo101 on November 18, 2018 at 2:26 pm

      I am so glad this could be helpful! I hope you are successful and getting past these obstacles!

  10. Nallely Tapia on November 18, 2018 at 4:27 pm

    Great post we do this so much without even realizing. Love the tips doing them starting now

    • cherishingflo101 on November 20, 2018 at 10:12 am

      So glad that I could help!

  11. Cockney on November 18, 2018 at 6:49 pm

    This post couldn’t have come at a better time I have been reflecting on my actions all day and know something needs to change. Thank you so much my self sabotage stops today and a fresh start tomorrow. ❤️

    • cherishingflo101 on November 20, 2018 at 10:13 am

      So glad that I could help! That’s amazing! I love fresh starts!

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